Wondering, Loving and Praying

5:00 Wednesday PM:   Headed home.  Grateful for 4 day weekend.   Praying for friends and family.  Wondering if the traffic could go any slower.

6:00 Wednesday PM:   Putting together chairs.  Grateful for new furniture.   Wondering if anyone will notice if they wobble.   Hubby notices.  Hanging upside down trying to balance chairs.  Huh…made in China.  Praying for the persecuted church in China.

8:00 Wednesday PM:   Still putting together chairs.  Wondering if anyone will notice my hands have permanently cramped into the shape of an Alen wrench.   Grateful for my father who has worked with his hands his whole life.   Praying the doctor can help him with the new treatment for his curled fingers.

10:00 Wednesday PM:   Tucking in my daughter.  Loving her eyelashes, loving her goodnight prayers.   Wondering if she’ll ever have a sibling.   Praying for Christine in Rwanda.  Praying this other daughter will have a good night.

11:30 Wednesday PM:   Making cranberry sauce.   Loving the smells of cloves and cinnanmon.   Loving the sound the cranberries make when they swell and pop.   Making cinnamon rolls.  Grateful for 16 years of cinnamon rolls with this man standing beside me.   Praying for the marriages of friends and family.

8:00 am Thursday AM:    Running a mile.  Cold.  Wondering if a mile constitutes actual excersize enough to work off the meal headed my way.  Grateful for sidewalks, friendly neighbors and a track at the local school.   Wonder if the school tuition in Rwanda is caught up.

9:00 am Thursday AM:     Getting ready.  Blowdryer.   Its pink. Praying for a friend facing tests for cancer.  Loving my daughter’s little toes and big smile.  Grateful for warm clean water.   Praying for the 18 people headed to our house.

10:00 am Thursday AM:    Breakfast with family.    Loving the cream cheese frosting on warm cinnamon rolls.   Loving Greek yogurt, bagels, fresh fruit.   Hoping next year sausage and cheddar are back in my diet.   Praying for family not present at the table.

11:00 Thursday AM:     Cleaning out a turkey with my mama.   Loving 35 years with this woman.   Wondering if the marketing departments know I’m aware that they leave the fat chunks for extra weight.   Praying I get to clean many more turkeys.  Praying for friends who no longer have their mamas.  Missing my grandma, first thanksgiving without her.

2:00 Thursday PM:    Cleaning out the garbage disposal.   Wondering why its only me that clogs it up.   Grateful the only time I cook is at holidays.    Praying for patience.

4:00 Thursday PM:   Nineteen people in our house.   Grinning at the pile of coats and shoes and scarves.    Praying.   Eating.   Loving the full plates and full tables.   Grateful for a place to include everyone.  Wondering where the pepper went.  Praying that these guests feel welcome and loved.  Praying that they know how very much God loves them.

10:00 Thursday PM:   Hugs.  Lots of hugs.   Putting away piles of games.   Wondering whose crystal dish I found.  Grateful for a country where prayer and thanksgiving are free.   Praying for our leaders.

4:00 Friday AM:   Turning off the alarm.  Why was I getting up?   Oh yes, its about the socks.   Wondering if it might not be worth paying normal price.   Grateful for friends who are as crazy as me.    Praying for safety.

1:00 Friday PM:   Tired now.   Wondering why the bank didn’t tell me I had a daily spending limit.   How annoying.   Grateful for a sister who has a debit card too.   Praying friends and family will enjoy the gifts.   Grateful for the first and ultimate Christmas gift.

5:00 Friday PM:    Eating pizza.   Loving pineapple and mozarella.   Grateful for old friends.  Praying for their teen group and ours.  Praying for wisdom for parents.

10:00 Saturday AM:   Running three miles.   Did I already mention the cold?   Grateful for coaches.   Praying I’ll be in charge of my body, not it in charge of me.

11:00 Saturday AM:   Eating a cinnamon role.    I think I already mentioned the cinnamon roles.   Really they are that good.   Wondering when I last blogged.   Praying for my niece and nephews.   Grateful for time to sit.

2:00 Saturday PM:   Craft bazaar.   Wondering where all the hats came from.   Wondering if its right to feel guilty for not buying a pot holder from the little Grandma.   Grinning with my kiddo at the tiny Christmas tree for her doll house.   Grateful for fun days.

5:00 Saturday PM:   Sitting by the fire.   Wondering if I can finish all my shopping this weekend.   Probably not.   Praying that in our house, that the miracle of Jesus doesn’t get lost in the ribbons and bows.   So very grateful for Emmanuel.  God with us.

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Prayers

Whenever I think about praying I’m amazed that God actually hears and responds to us.   I don’t for a minute believe that by praying we can force God to do what we want but I do believe the Bible when it says that the prayers of a righteous man are effective.   Like everyone, I’ve had prayers that God answered with a No.   I’ve had prayers that God answered with a Wait.   I’ve also had the joy of having some prayers answered with a resounding YES.

When I was about four I had one of those answers.  Our car wouldn’t start and I prayed and asked God for it to start.  As the story goes, my mother was a little nervous, she didn’t want my foundling faith rattled if God didn’t respond with a miracle.   God wasn’t worried though and the car started right up.

At seventeen, I was driving home from Portland when the wheel on my cool Cutlass Supreme fell off the axel.  (I also believe in angels because I didn’t crash, I just pulled over).   Sitting there in the car in the dark on the side of the freeway in 1993 I did not have a cell phone.  So I prayed a very simple plee.  God….send someone to help who won’t hurt me.   I got out of the car to walk and try to find a pay phone and guess what….my dad pulled up.   He’d been called out to an emergency late call which never happened and driving home noticed my car on the side of the road.   When God decides to answer sometimes He does it with style.

We’ve been trying to sell our house for about two months.  If you watch the news then you know that this is the worst time to be  selling a house.  About a week ago, we had several showings which ended with absolutely no interest.   We also had our one “backup plan” turn into a “never gonna happen”.   Last Wednesday, we asked some friends and family to fast and pray with us.   That same day we had a showing and now a week later, we have a cash offer, no inspection, no appraisal, moving in two weeks agreement.

My husband told my daughter to never forget this miracle.  I pray when she is in her thirties that she’ll still remember this day.  I pray that she’ll have her own list of times when God heard her.    I echo a prayer that our pastor frequently uses “Lord, Give us our Kids for the Kingdom”.

I’m Trading

My sister and I had a trading game we played when we were growing up.  It started with Halloween candy but it also worked with stickers, hair clips, jelly bracelets, or on really bored days random bits of fluff and junk.   We’d bring our bags and dump them out on either side of the coffee table.  We’d each line our offerings up and then take turns picking from each other’s side until at the end we had a brand new batch of whatever.   It was a little like chess because you had to keep a strategy to protect your best candy.  I don’t remember the rules but I know they were complex.  I was six years older.  I usually got better stuff.  My sister though is a wily one and she caught on very quickly.  Neither of us liked coconut then so the Almond Joys and Mounds always presented a problem.  At some point I figured out that my dad would take these nasty candies out of the Halloween pile if I offered them up and then my sister and I didn’t have to worry about ending up with those.

The last few days I’ve been reading a great book.   Second Guessing God by Brian Jones. If you have questions about faith that you can’t seem to answer try this book.  If you have been hurt deeply I think it might help.  If you, like me, just need a good attitude adjustment I am almost positive it’ll work.

Yesterday I was driving out to meet my family for a night at the lake.   On my way, I prayed an honest and painful prayer.  It went something like this….

“ARGHHHH. I am in a crabby mood! I’ve been tired and sad for a bit here and frankly I’m sick of myself.  I do not want to reflect to people around me anything that resembles despair.  I want to reflect hope but right at this second I don’t have that.  I know when I went to Rwanda I said it was because I wanted to be Gloriously Ruined but this broken thing is not at all what I meant.   (read Kay Warren’s book Dangerous Surrender and you’ll know what I’m talking about….God knew when I said it) I really just need to know You see me.  Help. Help.”

Guess what.  God likes honest prayers.   I pulled over to the side of the road and took this picture.

For me last night this was not just a sunset   Psalm 19:1 says “The heavens declare the glory of God; the skies proclaim the work of his hands.”

I had a little mini revival in my Mazda 3.  It’s a zippy little car.   Corners nicely on the windy roads.  Has a cool Ipod hookup and speakers that last night were blaring out church songs.   I’ve heard them all a million times but last night I was singing along.  I sang loudest last night to I’m Trading My Sorrows.

I am pressed but not crushed

persecuted, but not abandoned

struck down, but not destroyed

I am blessed beyond the curse,

for His promise will endure

and His joy is going to be my strength

Though the sorrow may last for the night

His joy comes with the morning.

I’m trading my sorrows

I’m trading my shame

I’m laying them down for the joy of the Lord

I am definitely taking that trade.  I feel much better.  Let me know if you need a copy of Second Guessing God or frankly if you need a Bible.  I’d love to get you one, maybe we can trade.  What books do you have?